DOSE: T+ 0:00	repeated	insufflated	Cocaine	(powder / crystals)
T+ 0:00	repeated	oral	Alcohol - Hard
T+ 0:00	60 mg	oral	Codeine	(pill / tablet)
T+ 0:00	1 g	oral	Acetaminophen	(pill / tablet)
T+ 0:00	100 mg	oral	Pharms - Tramadol	(pill / tablet)
T+ 4:00	1 g	oral	Acetaminophen	(pill / tablet)
T+ 4:00	60 mg	oral	Codeine	(pill / tablet)
T+ 4:00	100 mg	oral	Pharms - Tramadol	(pill / tablet)
T+ 6:00		oral	Unknown	(powder / crystals)

BODY WEIGHT:

110 lb

It was Spring and my boyfriend and I arranged for a few friends to come over for a barbecue. My boyfriend's brother had given him a gram of what had been sold to him as 'magic' (MDMA powder) and between us all we had about a quarter ounce of cocaine, along with beer, vodka and other alcoholic beverages (and of course some food too!).

I had a prescription at the time for co-codamol [codeine with acetaminophen/paracetamol] 30/500 and tramadol 50mg, prescribed for me after a car accident, which I no longer suffered pain from but I enjoyed the warm fuzzy feeling the codeine gave me and how the tramadol accentuated it, so I would take a few of these pills almost every day anyway, I had 4 of each pill that evening, a dose of 2 of each around the start (7pm) and another dose the same around 11pm.

I rarely drink, and have naturally low tolerance for alcohol, I am a very experienced user of cocaine with a high tolerance; I had a lot of experience with ecstasy but had not used it for years, and was a little tentative about taking it due to the effects (assuming due to purity levels) being so widely variable and unpredictable (unlike trusted favourite coke!).

I had about half a bottle of vodka and countless lines of coke (there were 5 of us and we shared 2x 1/8th bags) from around 6pm until midnight and had a great time. I would have been happy just to carry on like that, I wasn't really interested in doing the 'MDMA'.

However, the others all decided at around midnight that they were going to do it, and I didn't want to be on a different wavelength to everyone else, so i did partake, although I split my 200mg share into half. Everyone else took 200mg, although I was the smallest of the group!

After about 45 minutes, I glanced at a row of CDs, and coloured light shone from them celestially, then I looked at the wall and it rippled; I remember thinking this feels more like LSD than MDMA.

We moved into the sitting room, and lazed around on the couches. We started having this ridiculous, intellectual banter like you have when you're on acid- and laughing our heads off, in stark contrast to any MDMA experience I've ever had, where I'd felt blissed out and loved up but unable to converse properly or utilise my full vocabulary. The only ecstasy-like sensation I had was floods of floaty 'rushes'. I remember feeling like my body and the couch were becoming fused together I felt like I wanted to melt into it.

I felt a little dozy and decided I wanted a 'pick-me-up'. I invited anyone else to come back into the kitchen for a line of coke, but no-one else fancied one. I kind of didn't want one on my own, I hadn't expected anyone to decline, but I felt like I couldn't get it out of my mind then so had to see the idea through! So off I went, sniffed a little line then came back in, feeling perky.

After a few minutes I felt a little hot, so I removed my cardigan. Instead of cooling down, I felt like I was getting hotter still, so I took deep breaths and hiked my t-shirt up exposing all the skin on my belly. Again, I only seemed to feel hotter after that and it started feeling 'wrong' and uncontrollable. I got up and went to the back door to sit on the step in the fresh air, but I felt like that didn't help either, I still felt like I was getting hotter. I started to panic, and went back in to ask my husband to sit with me. He did, and I explained to him that I felt unwell, he asked what he could do to help and I asked for ice. He fetched me a cup of ice, and I ate a cube, then put another on my forehead. It melted SO quickly, like when you turn a hot tap onto ice in the sink! I found that worrying, and I went outside to lie down on the bench, I placed the rest of the ice out of the cup onto my stomach, and watched it melt, yet I still felt too hot. I remember looking at the sky which was purplish blue (very beginnings of morning twilight, it was around 3am) and thinking that would be the last time I'd see it, thinking this is it this is the night I shall die. I felt so full of regret.

I became intent on trying to save my life, and was convinced that I was overheating, so I went up and ran a cold bath, and begged my boyfriend to fetch the bag of ice cubes from the freezer, which I emptied in and got into the bath fully-clothed. I considered calling an ambulance, but having experienced bad trips before, I knew that there was a chance any perceived danger was all in my mind, and didn't want to do anything unecessarily, so I kept asking my boyfriend what he thought. The only advice he kept insisting on was that I should get out of the bath, but I felt like the bath was saving my life so I was reluctant to do so. I asked him to feel my forehead and tell me if it was burning, but he said I felt cold 'like a corpse' and he sounded a little scared as he begged me to get out of the bath. I eventually agreed, but as I felt like I should have stayed in there I wanted extra reassurance that I didn't have a high temperature, so I took my temp with a thermometer. It was 32.4 [about 90 Fahrenheit]. I knew that was actually dangerously low. Once that reality sunk in, I no longer felt hot. I started shivering and let my boyfriend wrap me up in blankets and lie with me.

Eventually I fell asleep. When I woke up I felt fine.

My boyfriend (who hadn't slept) then started to break down and was panicking that he had kidney failure- I was calming him down by assuring him he had no symptoms (I had seen on an episode of 'House' that one is urine-odour breath, so kept asking him to breathe on my face and there was no trace of urine smell!) Eventually he slept too.

Afterwards we spoke to our friends and they all said that they had had similar, nightmarish panic-attacks and felt too hot and convinced they were going to die.

We had all used MDMA before and agreed that the substance we had had was not MDMA. After some internet research I believe that the substance was PMA, and I suspect I maybe had either serotonin syndrome or a psychotic delusional panic attack. Either way, I could have died from hypothermia! The irony of almost killing myself trying in desperation to save my life!

Put me off drugs for a long time and would never go near unreliable untested 'MDMA' again! Writing this almost 2 years after the experience still makes me feel terrified reliving it all!

Exp Year: 2011	ExpID: 99290
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 30
Published: Sep 25, 2015	Views: 9,389
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PMA (126), Cocaine (13) : Combinations (3), Health Problems (27), Small Group (2-9) (17)