DOSE: T+ 0:00	0.5 tablets	oral	MDMA
T+ 1:00	0.5 tablets	oral	MDMA
T+ 4:00	0.5 tablets	oral	MDMA

BODY WEIGHT:

55 kg

Good MDMA is so hard to find in my country. Almost anything you find is either cut with all sorts of nasty substances (usually speed and/or caffeine), or so weak that it doesn't do anything at all. When I got contact with someone who had some good Dutch pills, I jumped at the chance, ending up with red Defqons. This was the first time I had sourced my own pills too - a good friend of mine has more contacts than me and usually sources for us.

My plans for the weekend were to go to a local hardstyle rave and party the night away. I have been around the rave scene for a few years, but, although I had tried Ecstasy (I don't feel it is right to call the local stuff MDMA, in all honesty) a fair few times before, I had never taken it at a proper rave due to the adulterants so common here - I always go to and leave raves on my own, and didn't want to risk getting a bad batch and ending up sick or worse. Since I knew this batch I had were good, clean and strong, I decided to try it.

My friend, who has a much higher tolerance than me, told me he was getting some MDMA caps on the Friday, and did I want any. I hadn't told him about my Defqons, but casually shrugged it off at the time and told him I would be alright this time. I didn't want to tell him about them when he was sober, since he often teases me about my low tolerance and how I will roll off anything.

Friday night I was working late shift, and he came into my work. He had obviously had taken a little bit of MDMA, but told me that it was pretty bad quality and he wasn't feeling it very well. He was, however, bouncing off the walls, and casually asked me if I knew where he could get more.

The reaction I got when I told him I had some on me was priceless. The reaction I got when I showed him what I had was even better - he had never seen a Dutch press personally before, but knew of the stamps and which ones were good. I gave him 2, one for him and one for his friend, and dropped them to their preferred club after I finished work. The last contact I had with him that night was a text message: 'Holy ****, only do half!'

The next evening was my rave. That day I had eaten very little, but had drunk a litre of milk with meal replacement powder in it for breakfast, a standard habit for me, and valuable due to the L-Tryptophan proteins - the precursor to serotonin, the chemical MDMA acts upon - in both the supplement and the milk.

I chewed half a pill around 11PM (the worst-tasting one I've ever had, that's for sure!), and went and chilled out near the front of the crowd, finding some old friends and chatting for a while. After an hour, I still hadn't come up, and so decided to risk it and take the other half of the pill.

Typically, I started to peak off the first half within 5 minutes of dropping the second, with the standard reaction of 'Uh oh, that was a bit stupid!' Too late now. Half an hour later, I was pleasantly buzzing, dancing myself silly, making friends, and generally having good fun.

All of a sudden, I didn't know where I was. This lasted about 10 seconds, and then my next memory is of being in another corner of the rave. This again lasted about 10 seconds. I remember walking across an empty space, but can't remember why. I think I was going to get water. Once again, only a 10 second block that all I can recall is pure euphoria. Even now I get tingles remembering it.

I lost all track of time and reality. It was only the next day, when I tried to work out how long I was 'out' for (I know I was conscious, however I didn't retain any memories whatsoever), that I worked out I couldn't remember anything of 3 DJ sets, so I was peaking for around 3 hours, with only those 10-second blocks to try and piece together.

Around 3AM, I felt like I had crashed, though looking back, I was still rolling incredibly hard. I foolishly ate another half, which seemed to have very little effect, at least to me at that point. I worked out that there was no option but to come down eventually. For the last 2 hours of the rave, I spent most of the time at the back of the crowd, chatting with friends old and new.

The rave finished at 6AM, after which I had to take an hour-long train trip to get home. This was when I realized how much more MDMA than usual I had taken. I was looking at my eyes and admiring my huge pupils, and started completely tripping out. I can't remember what I saw, though I wish I could. Any time something changed the rhythm - the train hitting a corner, stopping at a station, or someone talking to me - I would snap back into reality, though it wouldn't be more than 1 minute before I was tripping again. It was incredible.

When I got home, I attempted to use the computer, however had to give up on that due to eye wiggles making it impossible to read the screen. Apparently I was still tripping out, as I was fascinated with the patterns on the roof, which don't exist in reality at all!

After a couple of hours I ended up in a deep sleep, however with very vivid dreams. I slept for around 6 hours and woke up feeling extremely good, which surprised me - I was expecting a bad hangover. Later on, I discovered that I was still rolling a little, which was hilarious since I had to work that night. Luckily I didn't do anything too foolish, though I'm pretty sure I was still very out of it.

A few extra notes:

- I have Tourettes Syndrome , and MDMA usually cancels all the tics associated with that. However it seems that the high dose (approx 240Mg in total) caused its own tics, which were then amplified by my Tourettes.

- I naturally am very introverted, however MDMA makes me friendly as anyone. I made more friends in the one night than I had made in 3 years of going to raves sober.

- Apart from a can of energy drink (which was less than my normal daily caffeine, I didn't want to influence my roll) earlier in the day, I had no chemicals in my system apart from MDMA. The Defqons have been lab tested as just MDMA and binders, hence why I risked a higher dose than I would otherwise consider safe.

- Next time I dose high MDMA, I am going to attempt to keep a 'roll log' to try and work out what happens in the time I don't remember. That is the only part of the night that I regret - that I can't recall such a big chunk of it.

Exp Year: 2012	ExpID: 96703
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 21
Published: Jul 23, 2019	Views: 933
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MDMA (3) : General (1), Rave / Dance Event (18)