DOSE:	1 mg		Pharms - Buprenorphine
	.025 mg		Naloxone
	1 mg		Pharms - Buprenorphine
	.025 mg		Naloxone

BODY WEIGHT:

130 lb

I am a drug addict. I have met many opiate users that were in the transitional stage from having fun to becoming an addict and able to rationalize the compartmentalization of addiction away. I have surpassed this step in ladder of opiate use. I am a drug addict, though I am not currently using.

I am a connoisseur of opiates. I have had a soft-core addiction to hydrocodone, tramadol, and oxycodone and used them intermittently through my addictions of other opiates. I have had a hardcore addiction to morphine, heroin, poppy pods, and, most recently, buprenorphine. I never liked methadone very much, but I’ve only tried it after I had grown a massive tolerance. Out of this genre of addiction I would like to discuss my views on both sides of the opiate coin.

Opiates are the one drug that called to my personality. They never fully intoxicated me to the point of acting like an imbecile; on the contrary, they made me feel more socially tuned to my friends and produced a more casual environment for conversation, though in the addiction phase I’m sure my friends would argue this point. My first experience with opiates was of a magical nature, much like an MDMA experience, but it felt less forced and more laid back. My favorite opiate was morphine via plugging. I was on nods that were champions compared to sex.

After using opiates for a few days the user will inevitably find a certain loss in magic, so logically some people quit using and save it for a time when it will work, but as my use progressed I became less and less structured about my use. Slowly but surely I became conditioned to the idea that just taking a pill would solve any ill effects of life. When I was deep into addiction, I’d say this was around my poppy pod stage, I started noticing a steep decline in my mental condition. I felt shitty for three quarters of the day and good for about the six hours in the morning when I would take my first dose (subsequent doses usually failed at making me feel good).

During this part of my addiction a friend lured me onto a miracle drug of suboxone, and it was a breath of fresh air. . . at first. My friend gave me some thinking I would take the quarter of a pill in two doses and be done with the withdrawal from pods, but I grew another addiction. The one thing I liked about it is that it was cheap. I could buy it for ten dollars and it would last me four days. This was much better than other pills I fucked around with; for instance a day on morphine would cost me from forty to one hundred dollars for sixty to squirt one hundred and fifty milligrams into my ass. Buprenorphine became an addiction lasting a year but it was the worst of all the withdrawals I have ever encountered. I haven’t gone through methadone withdrawal so I can’t compare it to what the people that have endured that withdrawal, but it was massively fucking bad. I was in fetal position flopping around in my bed for five days straight followed by a severe depression that left me crying for no apparent reason (other than withdrawal) throughout the day. I write this out of an attempt to let people know that this drug was not all it was hyped up to be from my personal experience. I tapered down to a milligram at the end but it still wasn’t enough to jump past the spiked blades in the road. If I were in position of being addicted to heroin or morphine I’d much rather take those withdrawals. Morphine withdrawal was a beast, but the worst of it is over in a few days. This withdrawal lasted for over four weeks.

Bupe may seem like a miracle drug at first, but in the long run I still hit the hump, and it was a much longer one.

Exp Year: 2009	ExpID: 83797
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 23
Published: Jan 18, 2017	Views: 1,946
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Opiates (207), Pharms - Buprenorphine (265) : Unknown Context (20), Addiction & Habituation (10), Retrospective / Summary (11)