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Struggling Through This, Don't Know Where to Turn
Oxycodone
Citation:   BelieveBG. "Struggling Through This, Don't Know Where to Turn: An Experience with Oxycodone (exp74607)". Erowid.org. Nov 12, 2015. erowid.org/exp/74607

 
DOSE:
  repeated   Oxycodone (pill / tablet)
BODY WEIGHT: 125 lb
Addiction to Oxycodone

So here's my story, and while I'm writing I'm trying to recover but not sure how long it will last.

A couple years ago, around 2005, I started talking oxycodone and hydrocodone for a cyst I had on my ovary. At first, I wasn't really interested in taking the pills for anything else but pain, to get through the night. Eventually, the pain had eased and I still wanted to take the painkillers for some reason. Sometimes my ex would tell me to take them when I started getting upset because they would make me so happy. I agreed. I didn't really take them everyday, but over the past 3 years I've took them on and off. In the past year I have noticed that I've been spending a lot more money on them and frequently wanting to do them.

Me and my fiance wanted to make a pact and say that we are DONE altogether doing pills. That was yesterday, and today I feel like I want a couple percocet's to help my day go by a little easier.

We are champs when it comes to doing pills. We can get about twenty percocet 5mg and do all of them in one night. Also, we've spent a lot of money on percocet 10mg and have been able to finish those all with no problem either.

I can't get high off hydrocodone anymore. It seems too weak for us, perc's are all that we'll spend our money on. We both work, and want to pay our bills when we get paid, but we spent our whole paycheck last week on pills. That seems to be a problem to me.

I do want to quit. I know they make me feel so good but eventually I want to start a family and don't want to be in financial debt from spending all of my money, hundreds of dollars, on pills.

I'm not sure if it is more successful to slowly stop doing them, or stop doing them all at once and not looking back. That is very hard for us right now. We both get muscle cramps and it feels like restless leg syndrome. I can't sleep at night because I toss and turn ALL NIGHT. It is horrible. But we do them every single day. So I'm not sure if it's smart to just completely stop, or to slowly break the habit. I'm trying to decide which can work for us.

We are struggling through this and don't really know where to turn to. We've done some messed up stuff in order to get more pills too. Robbery, and that sort of thing. Horrible.

Exp Year: 2008ExpID: 74607
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Nov 12, 2015Views: 2,178
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Oxycodone (176), Hydrocodone (111) : Addiction & Habituation (10), Small Group (2-9) (17)

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