DOSE:		oral	Pharms - Fluoxetine	(daily)
		smoked	Cannabis	(daily)

BODY WEIGHT:

110 lb

When I was younger, like, way younger, I was abused and that causes me problems every once in a while. When I was around 14 or 15 I was going insane over everything. I had just moved, found out my abuser was moving in-state, and I had just started smoking bud.

Well, in that same time frame, I had been seeing psychologists and psychiatrists to help me deal. (They didn't help.) I was prescribed Prozac. I voluntarily took it and at first it was peachy. I wasn't crying. I wasn't depressed. Then eventually as the Prozac built up in my brain, I realized that I wasn't sad, but I wasn't happy either. I was emotionless. I didn't like the idea of that. So I stopped taking it. My psychiatrist then prescribed me Lexapro, and I didn't take to that either. So I stopped. By the time I graduated from high school, I smoked alot of bud, and that's it.

I loved smoking from the instant I began. I loved how it took me away from everything. Everything was funny. I was having insane thoughts on everything from music to life. I felt like a new part of me had been released. I felt like when I was high, people saw the real me. The person inside. My friends all said I'm crazy at one point, I just said whatever came to mind. I smoked bud cause I loved it. I never saw it as doing a drug. My best memories are memories from times I did things high. I went to see The Cure, and christianed my first bowl on my 16th birthday. It was love from first hit.

Eventually, I started smoking every day, and not a few bowls, but a few blunts a day, then more, then more. I smoked so much it was crazy. I've since cut back to a blunt or so a day, and I've found that I'm much more relaxed, and more pleasant to be around. I feel better than I ever did on prescription medications. I have the confidence to do things when I got a buzz going. I'm more giddy and fun to be around when I'm high. This is the best thing that God put on this earth for depression.

Exp Year: 2007	ExpID: 65450
Gender: Female
Age at time of experience: 16
Published: May 14, 2018	Views: 5,017
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Cannabis (1), Pharms - Fluoxetine (80) : Retrospective / Summary (11), Glowing Experiences (4), Medical Use (47), Depression (15), Therapeutic Intent or Outcome (49), Not Applicable (38)