DOSE:	repeated		Pharms - Diazepam
	repeated		Various

BODY WEIGHT:

100 kg

My Valium Experiences

With 5mg orally:

This is my first experience ever with Valium. I took one pill at 11:30, then jumped in the shower. About 15 minutes later I started to feel slower, drowsier, more relaxed. It wasn't an unpleasant feeling, but there was nothing overtly pleasant about it either. By the time I got into bed at 12:00 I was very drowsy and pleasantly calm. There was no accompanying euphoria or apathy that I get with an opiate, however it was still a positive experience. I fell asleep shortly, so the continuation of the effects I did not get to experience, though it was the deepest sleep I'd had in months, and I awoke more refreshed than ever. One thing of note was that I either didn't dream, or I couldn't remember any of them.

With 10mg orally:

Two pills were ingested at 9:30 prior to commencing my dinner of two sandwiches. I lay down after eating to watch TV and at about 9:40 I was already feeling them kick in. It felt much as it did the night before, except it had happened a little sooner, but the intensity rapidly increased. It became difficult to keep my eyes entirely open, but I did not feel the need to sleep, though it would've been very easy to do so if I had shut my eyes and rested fully. The feeling of relaxation was intensified to the point of muscle relaxation, and movement became increasingly difficult as time went by. By the time I got up to go to bed, at 10:30, it took a lot of energy to haul myself up, and as I moved my legs felt weaker than normal. Euphoria accompanied the effects this time, but it was not as strong as with opiates, and again there was no apathy induced. Once again, I can not remember dreaming.

With 25mg orally plus alcohol:

Three pills were ingested at 10:00 prior to a bowl of ice cream. I laid down afterwards to watch TV again, and the first effects were noticed within 7 minutes. The usual first wave of relaxation and calmness overcame me, then sharply increased to extreme drowsiness by 10:15. The drowsiness was easy to shake and maintenance of consciousness not at all a problem; though, once again, had I chosen to drop my guard sleep would've come easily and quickly. At 10:30 Large waves of euphoria were overcoming me, accompanied by giddiness. Large, deep breaths and exhalations were almost orgasmic in nature. Movement was extremely difficult to maintain steadily, and I constantly stumbled about as I did move.

At 10:45 I decided to take another 5 mg pill, this time sublingually. By 11:00 I was stumbling about laughing and feeling very good. My friend and I decided to go out, and I had a glass of scotch, followed by a Green Fairy cocktail which included Absinthe and Vodka. After completing these, the time being about 12:15, I was incredibly intoxicated. First thing I noticed was tunnel vision, then an incredible slowing of bodily movements and mental thought. Everything around me seemed to be moving at an incredibly faster pace than normal. Conversation became increasingly difficult.

This extreme level of intoxication seemed to have worn off almost to base level by 1:30, but movement was still more difficult than normal and I was still sluggish. I returned home and at 2:00 decided to push the envelope and absorb another pill sublingually, taking the total ingested to 25 mg. The level of intoxication sprung right back up to where it was before, then continued to intensify. The tunnel vision returned with a vengeance, then my entire vision became blurred. Concentration on anything was almost impossible, but I felt very euphoric and giddy.

The drowsiness was so intense that remaining conscious took every ounce of energy I could muster. Sleep would require nothing more than shutting my eyes. My breathing was incredibly slow, which seemed to be somewhat of a worry, and as such I deigned to keep myself conscious for as long as possible in order to ensure I could maintain steady breathing. The experience was amazingly pleasurable, a feeling of total relaxation and sublime nothingness, similar to an opiate's blissful apathy, but with it's own unique bend.

Not something for cognitive thought, but certainly a pleasurable nothingness and reliever of problems and anxiety. At this level conversation is difficult; certainly not a sociable level of intoxication. When I finally got to bed, after much difficulty brushing teeth and changing clothes, I collapsed onto my mattress and was asleep within minutes. Strangely, while not vivid, I remember having dreams, whilst at the lower levels they had been entirely absent.

With 15 mg orally; followed by a further 15 mg insufflated plus alcohol and DXM:

Three pills were taken at 8:30 before heading to the movies. By the time I was in the queue to by the tickets, at 8:45, its effects were being strongly felt. Throughout the movie I felt the same dream-like, light euphoria that was induced by a 10 mg dosage, but the dream-like aspect was far more pronounced. There was no trouble following the movie or whispering to my the person I was with, but some things that weren't immediately obvious were missed, and I only picked up on them when the person beside me told me about them.

When we returned home from the movie, at around 11:30, we both wanted some Valium, and I decided I wanted to try them via insufflation, so I crushed up six 5 mg pills and sorted them out into 8 lines. We began drinking a four pack of vodka cruisers (only 5% alcohol), having two each, and had a line each every 15-30 minutes; everything was quicker via this method (i.e. onset, coming up), but so was the duration cut down. By the time the lines were gone we still had approx. 1/2 a bottle of a cruiser each. There was much euphoria and giddiness induced, with a very, very calmed, relaxed feeling, akin to that of a marijuana high but without any of the downsides (itchiness, sore lungs, paranoia, restlessness etc.), and I was simply content to lie on my friend's lap while we discussed things.

Although it was not the typical 'blissful apathy' of an opiate, it was not too far removed from it, in its own Benzodiazapine way, as in I was simply content and didn't care about anything that might've been troubling me at the time. At some stage I remembered that I still had a bottle of Robitussin lying around, and I went to get that. We approxiametly shared it, I had a little more than a half as she had never done it before, and then laid on a mattress together to enjoy the effects. While she experienced minor hallucinations, I did not. I am a very experienced psychonaut, and I had done DXM several times before. My usual dosage for wanting to trip out being 1 1/2-2 bottles, however, I had consumed only half a bottle before and hallucinated, so I believe that the fact that Valium reduces brain activity might have prevented the lower dosage working on my hallucinatory-adjusted brain.

One thing the Valium did do that was quite remarkable, however, was act as a powerful potentiator to the dissociative effects of the DXM. I had never experienced even slight dissociation with less than 1 bottle of DXM, and certainly had never experienced total dissociation with less than 1 3/4, but this time I felt complete dissociation, though it was easy to snap myself out of it. I am summising that this is due to the Valium.

With 10 mg sublingually:

This experience was virtually identical to the 10 mg oral experience, however it came on somewhat faster and its strength was somewhere between that of a 10 mg and 15 mg oral hit. Of note here is that while the onset and come up is faster here, unlike the insufflation method, the duration of the main effects of the drug are not diminished; at least not to a noticable method.

With 5 mg rectally plus alcohol:

I shafted a pill at 8:30 and waited for it to hit. By 8:50 I wasn't feeling much of anything and began to wonder if Valium was, perhaps, not active rectally, or whether my daily use of it lately had increased my tolerance where 5 mg wasn't enough. Being a very tall person, and perhaps something just to do with my body, I had always been able to take far more drugs than others, and often had to take 1 1/2-2 times what my friends would take to get similar effects, even before I had begun acquiring a tolerance for them.

By 9:00 I had gotten impatient, and I wasn't at home so I had no more pills, thusly I went inside a poured myself a liberal dosing of Tia Maria. I had another one of these before I finally got slammed with that familiar Benzodiazepine come up at about 9:20. I suddenly felt as if I'd just swallowed a 15 mg dose, and I sunk into my seat as the wave of relaxation and that slight smirk that came with the euphoria washed over me. The period of coming up was much more protracted, and it was far more enjoyable that way. Rather than that sudden crash of euphoria and relaxation I achieve (particularly with insufflation), it was a slow, gentle rolling, like I was being massaged.

When the peak was reached, it was far more intense than via the other methods, and the alcohol I had taken with it made me stumble over my words a bit. Drowsiness was quite pronounced, but I think that by this stage, because of my repeated experience with the drug, fighting off the urge to sleep was effortless. The peak subsided within the half hour and settled gently onto a plateau that was like a 10 mg oral dose. This was one of the most pleasurable experiences I'd had so far, but the socialability side of it left much to be desired.

With 30 mg rectally:

Having dabbled with 25 and 30 mg dosages, over protracted times, I decided it was time to push the envelope again. This time I thought I'd push it a long way. According the the makers of Valium, 40 mg is the maximum reccomended dosage, and this is meant only to treat seizures and the likes. Moreover, I was attempting this through rectal administration, where a 5 mg dose is akin to a 15 mg oral dose. It was therefore possible that such a high dosage could induce coma and serious depression of my breathing. However, with no information I could find on the net to help me, I decided that I would take this step in the name of discovery. I made sure I had a sober person with me at all times, and at 9:30 I placed 6 pills into a gel cap and shafted them.

Lying down to watch TV, as had become my usual ritual with Diazepam experimentation, I waited patiently this time for the effects to begin. They came, they REALLY came, just before 10:30, the same gentle rolling feeling that I had experienced with the 5 mg rectal administration, but much, much more intense. It was like the difference between some skinny, untrained masseuse versus a muscular, swedish professional with years of training. The next hour I laid watching this documentary, grinning stupidly, giggling every now and thing and writhing about with pleasure. My eyes were half shut and weren't opening beyond that for more than a few seconds no matter how hard I tried.

Then, come 11:30, the peak slammed into me like an express train and I stretched out my arms and legs, letting out a moan of ecstacy. My eyes narrowed to slits as I stared up at the roof, the light fragmenting through my eyelashes and provided a suitably entrancing sight for me to gaze at. The sound of the TV droned into nothing more than a background noise and my mind seemed to wipe into a blank slate as I lay there, eyes almost shut, mouth hanging open, moans of pleasure occasionally escaping. This was very much like a 300 mg dosage of Codeine, without the same intensity of euphoria.

My attempts to move were quite futile, as my muscles were so relaxed it took an incredible amount of strength to haul myself into a standing position. Eventually I managed to do so, and walking about was as amusing as it was arduous, tripping over my own feet and bouncing off of walls. Keeping consciousness at this extreme peak, particularly while lying down, took a lot of concentration, but the reward of maintaining it was well worth the effort.

Even after the peak had subsided, by 12:00, I was still very disoriented, relaxed and somewhat euphoric. The 'rush-like' euphoria was gone, and replaced by the 'dream-like' euphoria. I returned to my mattress to watch a movie, and thought to myself that this was, indeed, the only suitable activity for this level of intoxication, as brain processes were so dulled that concentration on anything other than moving pictures, and perhaps very, very slow, disjointed conversation, would be far too laborious. By the end of the movie, at 01:00, I was beginning to come down, and here I am writing the report first hand, right after the event, at 02:00 (for a change from the retrospective summaries of the previous reports).

Even now I am still highly intoxicated, this far into the come down it remains to be equal to at least a 15 mg oral dosage. Of note here, also, is that listening to music during the come down period has a very strong appeal to it, whereas the come down period during other methods of taking the drug does not seem to have any connection to it (i.e. listening to music is neither particularly pleasurable nor unwanted). I shall be retiring to bed soon, where I believe I shall sleep the most restfully I have of any of my experiences yet.

Exp Year: 2005	ExpID: 50087
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Sep 23, 2007	Views: 113,681
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Pharms - Diazepam (115) : Music Discussion (22), Retrospective / Summary (11), Not Applicable (38)