DOSE:	repeated	oral	Opiates	(pill / tablet)
	repeated	oral	Poppies - Opium	(tea)

BODY WEIGHT:

170 lb

'I'm never going to do drugs, I'm not like the other people in my family.' What an arrogant and stupid statement. I was really against drugs and did not want to be another source of shame to my parents like my coke/meth using sister. I had chances to use drugs but always prided myself on saying no. Pride cometh before a fall they say. I first had a little taste of hydrocodone when I had a cold. The syrup had a small amount of hydro but I was unconcerned, I was above drug use. What could be so great about it? I have (had) a really low tolerance to opiates.

I have a family full of people who are depressed/manic/obsessive-compulsive and whatever the hell other mental illnesses you can think of. I have add/ocd and had lots of severe depressive episodes. Anyways, the cold medicine was weak but left me somewhat in a comfortably numb (great song) state. I wanted more. The syrup was gone and that was that so I thought. Four months later, I had surgery for badly impacted wisdom teeth and was prescribed forty Lortab 10/500's. I did my research before the surgery on hydro and other opiates and was very excited about the whole ordeal. I was given morphine through the i.v. at the clinic and all I remember was a warm rush coursing through my entire body, the doctor putting the another needle in the i.v. saying to relax and the ceiling forming waves like the ocean as I sank into the operating chair.

I don't remember much about the day except trying to eat a milkshake while trying to remain conscious and spilling alot on myself cause I couldn't keep my mouth closed. I took a Lortab every 4-6 hours for the next couple of days. I layed around drinking smoothies and drifting in and out of consciousness and watching t.v. I loved every minute of it.

I decided to try it with a clear head about a week later and within a half hour I was sinking into the couch feeling like I was wrapped in a warm blanket. Waves of warmth and euphoria flooding through my body. I had no problems. No depression. I listened to Pink Floyd, The Beatles and any other trippy music while playing GTA: Vice City. Not doing any missions or even killing pedestrians, just cruising. I had an amazing expirience while falling asleep to the movie Spirited Away, a lucid dream like no other. I don't know if I was awake or sleeping or both, but I was part of the movie. I was in one of my favorite movies it was so real but so short lived. I snapped out of it and disappointed, went to sleep. This was just 10 mg. Like I said I had a really low tolerance.

I did this just once a week for about a month and went on vacation for two weeks. Upon returning, I took 15 mg. and started to get high 3-4 times a week. Never on work nights, never during the day. 20, 25 mg. Then I ran out. Panic. 2 months of sobriety and a near mental breakdown which had happened before but I now wanted the pills more than ever. I finally came across some at my grandparent's house and without thinking twice, took them. And I never stole anything, I was Mr. Perfect. I ran out and turned to poppy tea, which if done right can be very effective. Then while house sitting I hit the jackpot. 19 vicodin, enough for four highs. I used the cold water extraction method and it worked great. I was out again and pissed.

After a bad new years that sent me over the edge (I won't get into details) I spent the next few days with panic attacks and was saved by xanax. I jacked some percocet from my friends house and took 25 mg. on an empty stomach and it was like hydro but more intense but it didn't last as long. I made fakes to replace the stolen ones at my friends house. I decided to snort them 10 mg. of oxy and damn it took less to get high and hit about ten times faster. I was using this along with vicodin I was occasionally buying and poppy tea. When out of pills I would use the poppy brew which I had now worked to a science. I could nod-off with one cup. I still preferred pills because I didn't have to spend all the effort and deal with the mess of making poppy juice. Not to mention that poppy juice/tea tastes awful no matter how you try to alter it.

I never had withdrawls since I never used more than four times a week. Then I had a time when work was really slow so what did I do? That's right I couldn't score any pills so it was Poppy juice almost every day for two weeks. I knew it was a mistake but I didn't care. I got really high one night and looked in the mirror and had scabs and scratches all over my body. Damn, I was looking like a freaking junkie. I ran out of pods and still had no pills so I started to withdrawl. I had a headache for six days, was exhausted physically and emotionally, plus diarhea. It was a mild withdrawl but still very unpleasant.

I was sober the next few weeks until I went on a short road trip with some friends to get them weed (I don't smoke, I don't like it) and pills for me. My friend had many 'friends' in this town and after going from dealer to dealer I ended up with one choice, methadone. I had knowledge about it and bought a 40 tab for $25. I snorted 10 mg. and turned on Pink Floyd's live at Pompei dvd. I burned a little more that oxy but not bad. In a few minutes I felt the typical opiate high but with less of a rush. I hit another 5 mg. line 3 hours later and laid back and watched my Neighbor Totoro. It was a very pleasant experience and last a hell of a long time. The next day I was still high but felt dopesick. I tried to eat and vomited twice. I went to my therapist and almost fell asleep on the way there, scary. I wasn't feeling high anymore just just hung over. I slept for several hours and woke up for a few more hours and slept again.

That was about a month ago and I've been high once since. I've been substituting opiates with xanax and liquor. And it's just doesn't cut it. I knew what I was getting into when I took lortab but didn't realize the power of opiates fully. They are a great medicine and very fun and when used in moderation, can aid the creative process. But with my family history of mental illness and drug abuse it was an unwise decision to start taking these kinds of drugs.

Exp Year: 2004	ExpID: 42625
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: Not Given
Published: Aug 25, 2008	Views: 25,146
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Opiates (207), Poppies - Opium (43), Hydrocodone (111) : Addiction & Habituation (10), Depression (15), Retrospective / Summary (11), Not Applicable (38)