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I Just Had No Idea What Was Happening
Mushrooms - Panaeolus cyanescens
Citation:   melissa v.. "I Just Had No Idea What Was Happening: An Experience with Mushrooms - Panaeolus cyanescens (exp116804)". Erowid.org. Nov 30, 2022. erowid.org/exp/116804

 
DOSE:
3.6 g oral Mushrooms - Panaeolus cyanescens (dried)
BODY WEIGHT: 125 lb
3.6 Grams of Blue Meanies

I had been interested in psychedelics for about 3 years and have taken LSD and mushrooms to gain more knowledge, enjoy my trip, and learn more about myself. I do realize the consequences of taking these drugs at a young age.

It was about a month or 2 ago, I had bought 7grams of blue meanie mushroom strain from a friend of mine for my boyfriend and I. We had taken them the next day, he took 3.4 grams (he is heavier than me, he should have taken more) and I took 3.6 grams dipped in peanut butter, which I had regretted afterwards. We had planned our day out and were going to his friends house to hang out for a bit.

We were waiting for the peak, about an hour or less later, my body started to feel heavy and hallucinations were starting to get stronger. His friend finally arrived home, and I was starting to get out of it. This had been my most intense mushroom experience, and as soon as I walked in the door I sat down next to my bfs friends mom and told her that I am tripping on mushrooms and I'm not okay. I cant remember the conversation after that, but my bfs friend told us that we had to go on a ride to get his gf. So my bf and I sat in the backseat of his friends stick and we drove out to the mall.

Looking out the window, everything was warping and moving, trees were growing huge, and the car looked like it had a 360 lens on it. The music was awesome, until a sound of nature started playing. I started tripping out, I didnt know if it was real or not and I started freaking out, I'm not exactly sure why. My bfs friend started playing hi-c, and I started vibing to it. We had finally arrived to the mall, which felt like it had taken hours to get there but it was only 20 minutes. His girlfriend got into the car, and then my stomach started feeling upset after eating all of those mushrooms. My bf told me that eating these things is basically poisoning yourself, and I took that all too seriously. My whole body felt tingly, like the mushrooms were trying to get out of me. I folded and was sitting in an odd position, my bf was tapping me and asking me if I was okay, but I was so out of it that I kept forgetting to respond
my bf was tapping me and asking me if I was okay, but I was so out of it that I kept forgetting to respond
so I just said unicorn turtle beach ball. I couldnt comprehend anything that was happening until we got back to his friends house. His mom asked if I was okay and my bf just took me down to his basement. There was an xbox so we were just watching family guy.

My body was aching so unbelievably bad, it felt likes spikes were jabbing at it. I had a hard time walking, and as soon as I sat down I started balling my eyes out. I was telling my bf how I need to go to a mental institution and that I need to get help. He told me to stop thinking like that, I was trying to. I started bawling my eyes out, sobbing. Not the cute kind of sobbing, the ugly kind where snot is coming out of your nose. I kept thinking how my life is a movie, and I kept on thinking about the memories of summer and how choices have no consequences and that I can just change my whole life by speaking my mind or doing just one simple thing, create and cause dysfunction throughout every relationship / friendship I have had in my whole life. I sat there crying for what felt like an hour. I felt like puking but could only dry heave. My bf was holding me, telling me it will be alright and that I do not need to go to a mental hospital. He kept on reassuring me and holding me. I had finally spun back into reality, I started laughing. I told him that its just another monday. He started to smile and then he said to me, "we do this all the time, just another day, just another week. Me and u are jesse and jane." Referring to breaking bad, one of our favorite shows. He said I knew how these things worked, shrooms come in waves. I tried watching a bit of family guy, until I started to freak out more because I kept hearing noises coming from upstairs. Thats when my bfs friend came down and told us that we need to leave since hes going out somewhere.

I started freaking out because I had grown an attachment to his basement. I could barely walk or see anything as my vision was completely covered in hallucinations of my own imagination. I forgot how to walk so I was stumbling down the street to get to my car. My bf had to drive since he felt more in control of his trip, but the thing is that he is not as experienced in driving as I am and he doesnt even have his permit. I did not care a single bit, I told him I need to lay down in the back and let myself calm down.
[Erowid Note: Driving while intoxicated, tripping, or extremely sleep deprived is dangerous and irresponsible because it endangers other people. Don't do it!] We had finally arrived to his house and seconds later his mom saw us. She saw me stumbling trying to walk with no shoes on, she asked if I was alright but I had forgotten who I was. I forgot everything about myself, where I was at. All I knew is that I felt like vomiting. We went upstairs to his room and I went on his bed. A few moments later his mom came in and she was trippin out more than me and him both were. She was yelling at my bf and I just was sitting there trying to watch some tv. I was oblivious to everything and his mom was trying to talk to me, I forgot how to speak so I just told her I forget. She asked where my phone was to call my mom, and I had no idea so I told her I forgot. She then looked in my bag and found my phone and couldnt get into it and I just had no idea what was happening, she kept asking for my password but I couldnt remember it. By the time they finally got my moms number she was talking to her downstairs and I could barely walk they had to hold me by my hands. I was out of it so the screaming my parents were doing was oblivious to me, and I could have cared less. When my dad got home he was drunk and was laughing at me, thank god I wasnt the only sober person in the room. He asked how many grams I took, I told him a bit too much. I was starting to regain abilities in walking, and everything turned out okay.

My bfs mom didnt trust me after that, and my bf tells me he gets a lot of anxiety whenever he thinks of it. I still have nightmares about it and flashbacks from time to time, which is why that'll be the last time I take shrooms for a while.

Exp Year: 2022ExpID: 116804
Gender: Female 
Age at time of experience: 18
Published: Nov 30, 2022Views: 460
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Mushrooms - Panaeolus cyanescens (185) : Small Group (2-9) (17), Difficult Experiences (5)

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