DOSE:

25- 150 mg

oral

Pharms - Chlordiazepoxide

(capsule)

BODY WEIGHT:

210 lb

I have experience using Librium, or generic Chlordiazepoxide for detox setting in inpatient treatment centers to detox off severe alcohol dependency and even somewhat of recreation.

For context, I have experience using every substance in the book, minus some of the newer noids, and Research chemicals available now. I have gone through the hells of heroin addiction and withdrawal countless times. Alcohol withdrawal, benzo withdrawal, crack cocaine addiction, IV heroin and cocaine, insane alcohol dependencies, alcohol + benzo dependcies, numerous psychotic outbreaks leading me into the psychward and been narcanned over 18 times in my short 25 year old life. Luckily I beat the opiate habit back in 2018 and have been away from them when the game changed to straight fentanyl. I havent seen real heroin in probably 3 years. I've also been on suboxone maintenance, and what I consider a "librium maintenance", or a "gaba maintenance program" which my drug addict brain cosigns as "okay" to take since I have debilitating anxiety and agoraphobia and the longest I've had clean from zero substances other than the librium is the time I used it as prescribed, daily as a preventative and harm reduction drug.

What I mean by that is... It's much better that I went 11 months no PCP (my drug of choice... Read: psychotic outbreaks), followed by a cold turkey 100mg a day of librium which led me to seizures, a psychotic episode from lack of sleep and complete activation of every nerve of my body screaming at me. That's what benzo withdrawal causes.

I find it fantastic as a "maintenance" drug to stop me from using any other substances. Librium doesn't get me fucked up. The downside is - due to the extremely long half life and its active metabolites having a half life up to 200 hours it builds up in your system day after day when taken daily for days, weeks and in my case years on end.

Tapering is difficult. A jump from 100mg to 95mg instantly leads to no sleep *three days after dropping my dose*. I feel totally normal but NEED sleep and dont get any unless I reupped my dosage and dropped by only a milligram 3 days after dropping due to its half life. It makes it extremely difficult to gauge how I'll really feel and how much of a drop in dose I will be able to handle.

As a detox med, meaning prescribed no longer than 2 weeks for alcohol or benzo withdrawal its great. But any longer I think a different benzo would be better suited for anxiety disorders or social disorders like xanax, klonopin, etizolam, or even phenibut.

Its effect is very subtle compared to say, xanax. It slowly over 4 hours builds to an all body encompassing warmth blanket feeling. If xanax is like a 10 minute punch in the face and I feel like I sank in the couch... Librium's like a couple gentle slaps and feels like I got wrapped in a blanket.

Another good analogy comparing librium to other benzos Id say if librium is like being gently, and calmly asked to wake up by a beautiful woman... Xanax is like being woken up by tamborines smashing... Punching me in the f******* face in terms of effects.

Both have their own drawbacks and benefits. Librium lasts a ton longer but has 25% the recreational value unless taken in massive doses - for me, that's upwards of 200mg with "no tolerance". I kind of have a permenant benzo tolerance so only speaking for myself. This would he considered an extremely high dose. That will not make me pass out due to being on it so long. But if built up in the system day after day as little as one 25mg librium pill will knock me the hell out. I CAN NOT stay awake! After about 3-4 days on 100mg daily one 25mg pill taken midday will leave me completely unable to keep my eyes open and sleep for well over 16 hours if I dont get myself up. This led to me learning I had to take 75mg at night, and break the first 25mg capsule up over the course of the day as I worked. If I accidentally took too much before work or during work it would leave me very lethargic and needing sleep even though I already got 12+ hours.

I was a natural insomniac since before I can remember. I never in my life slept so much.

I also went to a cold turkey experience in jail when taking 50mg per day for a year. That was absolute hell and was hell for 2 months until I couldnt handle it anymore and got back on the librium. My heart would race and I'd shake like a leaf still even 2 months off if I thought of any social interaction, my upcoming court date, or other stressors.

And for a short, recreational experience report after being off librium for 2 months, still withdrawaling and taking 150mg.

T- 0:00hr
Took 150mg librium

T- 1:30hr
Feel it kicking in...like I mentioned... Feeling that gentle slap of relaxation. Very subtle. Definitely notice a visual difference. My mind is quieting down. After being in withdrawal for two months and literally feeling like I was dying, it was just surreal to not experience incredible anxiety and heart racing when I simply walked into a fast food chain to order food.

T- 3:30hr
Peaking. Starting to get light, but heavy eyelids. Very easy to ignore and stay awake unlike taking say, 2-4mg xanax no tolerance. I'd compare it to about 1mg xanax effects wise. I know this would knock some out, others not. Speaking for myself.

T - 4:30+
Still peaking. Same effects. Wonderful to finally not have all these intruding thoughts and rollercoaster of emotion from the withdrawal. I think ill finally fall asleep tonight within an hour or two of laying down (I typically lay from 10-3am trying to fall asleep).. But we'll see.

I'll end here. I know I'll feel this blanket type effect well into tomorrow and the next morning, when I'll just dose 25mg to start taking my script as prescribed. I ran out of suboxone and used that as an excuse to take more than I'm prescribed and am *not* dealing with running out early again, lol.

Exp Year: 2020	ExpID: 115004
Gender: Male
Age at time of experience: 25
Published: Dec 26, 2020	Views: 3,338
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Pharms - Chlordiazepoxide (356) : Addiction & Habituation (10), Retrospective / Summary (11), Not Applicable (38)